My Strength
by ecrespol
Summary: This is my first attempt at any type of fan fic, it is Takari because that's all I intend to write. Also this is based somewhat on true events so it's not completely a fic, but I hope that you enjoy reading it. *Warning Tearjerker*
1. My Strength

**_Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters._**

**_A/N: This story is very sad. If you are the kind to cry reading a sad stories you will definitely need a tissue._**

As I sat there my mind couldn't help but begin to wander, it was as if a great fog had settled in and was preventing me from seeing clearly. I knew that I was crying, but for some reason I wasn't able to feel the tears running down my face. In fact I wasn't able to feel much of anything, my face and my body had gone completely numb by this point. 

I looked over to my big brother who was the only other person whom I ever looked to give me strength, but he had his head in his hands and was sobbing as uncontrollably as I was. I continued to look around the rather dimly lit room hoping to see some glimmer something that would give me even the slightest sense of hope, but I saw nothing. All that was in the room was sorrow, even though the room was filled with, people, my friends no less, yet I still felt like I was all alone, I felt so distant from everyone and everything. 

The one person that would be able to pull me through such a difficult time was gone and I was completely lost. I was so sad but at the same time I felt angry, angry over the fact that the person who meant the most in the world to me broke the most important promise of all. A promise that was only made a few days before, the promise to stay with me forever. 

I kept going over the events of the last few days in my mind, unable and unwilling forget them. Every time I closed my eyes those images etched themselves deeper and deeper into my mind. Three days ago I had never been so happy and now I felt as if I drowning, unable to breathe being pulled lower and lower. How could every thing have changed so fast I wondered as I closed my eyes. 

# ~~@@ 3 Days Ago @@~~

(Bell Rings) 

"Hey Kari, you wanna sit with me at lunch today" Davis asked with a bit of hope. 

_No but, since your going to follow me anyway… _Kari thought 

"Well TK, Yolie and Cody were going to meet me, but I guess you could join us" replied Kari trying to hold back what she really wanted to say. 

"Well as long as you're the…" Davis started to say before being cut off. 

"I almost forgot, I have to go, se ya Davis" said Kari as she bolted for the door hoping Davis wouldn't follow. 

Sure enough, he didn't follow in fact Davis didn't even get up. He focused on the exchange that he and Kari just had and convinced himself that Kari had just invited him to have lunch with her, and then that would mean that she has feelings for him. 

Meanwhile on the other side of the same building… 

"Have you seen your brother" a high pitched and screechy voice bellowed in the ear of young Takeru Takashi. 

He turned to see Jun Motomiya, Davis' older sister standing there with an expectant look on her face. 

"Uh, you mean Matt" TK answered. 

"No, I mean your other brother…… of course I mean Matt" screeched Jun 

"No sor…" TK started to say but stopped when he realized that she had already taken off. 

TK couldn't help but smile at the similarity between Jun and Davis. The similarity went far beyond the fact that they shared the same last name, but the way that Jun seemed to pursue his brother was so similar to the way that Davis seemed to go after Kari. Deep down he hoped that Kari felt the same way about Davis as Matt felt about Jun. 

TK however could only pause on this thought for a moment before continuing on to the cafeteria for his daily lunch with his friends. When TK walked into the cafeteria he immediately levitated over to the table where he saw Yolie, Ken and Davis and quickly took a seat with them. No later than a second after he sat down Kari burst into the cafeteria and came over to the table. 

"Do you mind if I sit here." she asked TK already knowing what the answer would be. 

"Sure." TK quickly responded. Blushing slightly after he realized how truly quickly he did respond to the question. TK wasn't surprised that she sat down next to him after all she had been sitting with her best friend for years so he didn't really think it was a big deal. Yet at the same time he felt a sense of joy over the fact that Kari had taken the seat next to him and not next to Davis. 

Kari sat down, glad that Davis wasn't able to hover over her, but feeling even better that she was sitting next to her best friend. Lately Kari had started thinking more and more about TK, but not as a friend, but as something much more. 

"So Kari what'ya doing after school today?" Davis inquired 

Kari jumps startled as if she had been pondering an important question, when Davis surprised her. "Huh, wha…?" She spoke. 

"We were going to study for the big biology test we have on Friday." TK interjected smiling perhaps a bit to much at the scowl that those words brought to Davis' face. 

"Yep, I really have to do well on this test and biology is TK's best subject." Added Kari, with a smile of her own. 

"But Ka…" Davis started to respond before being interrupted by the ringing of the bell that signaled the end of lunch. 

  
~~@@@@~~ 

The rest of that day just seemed to go so quickly, I suppose I was just looking forward to my study date with my friend. At the time I was still trying to determine what I was more afraid of, losing my best friend or missing the opportunity to be with my greatest love. 

The one thing that I never thought of was that I would lose both. 

  
~~@@ 3 Days Ago @@~~ 

{Knock, Knock} 

"I've got it!" yelled Kari already knowing who was at the door. 

The door swung open and there stood young Takeru. 

"Hi Kari" TK said as soon as he saw her beautiful smile. 

"Well, are you going to stand there all day?" Kari replied thinking that something was different about her friend today. Then it struck her he wasn't wearing his hat, and it looked like he had put, gel in his hair. 

Kari couldn't help but giggle, thinking about what Matt would do to his brother if he caught him touching his hair-care products. 

"What's so funny." TK asked. 

"Oh, nothing." She quickly responded. 

With that the two ran to her room to begin the preparation for what lay ahead of them (The Biology Exam). 

After over three hours of review, both TK and Kari felt confident that they knew the material. 

TK glanced over at Kari and noticed that she was beginning to look a little nervous. 

"What's wrong." He asked. 

"Oh, It's nothing, It's just……… TK I Love You!" Kari blurted out. 

TK so startled by this confession fell off of the bed that he was sitting on. TK looked up from his new position on the floor to see Kari standing over him with tears forming in her eyes. Finally those words that he had been waiting to hear for so long had been spoken. 

"Kari" TK spoke gently. 

"I love you more than I can ever express in words." TK responded with tears already rolling down his cheeks. 

With that he leaned up from the floor and ever so softly brushed his lips against Kari's. The gentle kiss filled them both with a sense of warmth that they had never felt before. It was as if a light had gone on and showed them that is was what was always meant to be 

As the two lay on the floor in each other's embrace, each one was thinking to them-self that this was the happiest moment of their lives. 

After what seemed like hours TK spoke. "Do you think we should get up" 

"Why, do you?" replied Kari with a little bit of worry as if, TK was having second thoughts about the relationship. 

"Of course not, it's just that this is your brothers room too and what if he walks in?" TK asked, not really worried about it, because for him being with Kari was worth all the consequences. 

But after hearing the question Kari had already jumped to her feet. 

"I didn't even think of that." Kari exclaimed. 

"Why don't we go for a walk before it gets dark" 

"Sounds Great" TK responded. 

The young couple walked for what seemed to be hours until they reached a bench in the middle of the Obadia Park where they chose to sit before heading back home. 

"Kari" 

"Yes TK" 

"I was wrong." Replied TK 

"Wrong about what?" Questioned Kari. 

"Wrong when I thought that this afternoon was the happiest moment in my life." Spoke TK ever so gently. 

"You see as I sit on this bench looking into your eyes, I realize that every second of every day that I'm with you will be the happiest moments of my life." He said with passion. 

Before TK could continue speaking he was met by Kari placing a delicate kiss across his lips. 

"I feel the same way." Kari gently whispered into his ear. 

With that the two began to walk home, going the exact route home that they took to get too the park. Down the same streets across the same grass they had walked hundreds of times before. Somehow this felt different to them the pavement seemed to sparkle and the grass emit a sweet smell. 

The two love birds came to a traffic light and paused waiting for it to tell them it was safe to walk. As they waited they each spoke gently to each other "I love you." 

The light changed, perhaps a bit to fast for them, for they were in no rush to get home. Before they proceeded TK glanced at his watch and noticed it was 11:56 pm exactly. With that they started across the street, perhaps a bit preoccupied with each other to notice the bright lights that were approaching. After all they were in love so they saw bright lights all around them. 

The still silence of that night, which seemed to follow the perfect day was shattered by a thunderous crash… 

~~@@@@~~ 

  
I still remember waking up in the hospital sore, my body feeling like it was broken the next day with a doctor standing over me. I knew that a car had hit me, but it seemed so unreal to me, because I had not even heard the screeching of tires or a honking of a horn. 

Then I remembered where I was that night and I looked up at the doctor and asked "what happened to…" but, from the look in his eye as I started to pose the question, I already knew the answer. That was the moment the pain in my body went away, I couldn't feel it any more in fact I couldn't feel much of anything anymore. 

You were my one true love my source of strength through even the darkest of hours I don't know if I can make it without you, I don't even know if I want to try. 

************ 

_This is my first story, I plan on adding a little epilogue next Monday (02/05), and please support your local S.A.D.D. (Students Against Drunk Driving) or similar organization. _

_ _

_Please Read and Review this and post CC, this was the most difficult thing I have ever written. _

** **

**Melissa M. 03/09/79 – 02/05/98 11:56 PM. You are my everything, my sole purpose for being, without you my strength is gone.**


	2. Epilogue

February 5, 2001  
  
  
  
To My One & Only Love,  
  
  
It's kind of strange when I think about it, the last three years that is. I still find it hard to believe that it has really been three years since that day. They say that time heals all wounds, but now I realized that "they" really don't have any idea what they're talking about. Three years I thought to myself that should be enough time for the healing process to at least start. Unfortunately it hasn't, I still see you every time I close my eyes. You're all that I seem to think about. I know that I'm not going to be able to make any sense out of your death, but that doesn't mean that I can just accept it.   
  
How could I accept that, you were gone and there was absolutely no reason for it? My thoughts now turn to anger, how could this have happened, how could he have done this too you. I remember sitting in the courtroom feeling a slight sense of gratification that the jury came back guilty on the charge of vehicular manslaughter, for the man that took you away. It was so hard for me to accept that some drunk could just take you away forever without so much as stepping on the brakes. However that sense of gratification did not last long, as the judge in his "infinite wisdom" ruled on what his punishment should be, I felt as though my heart was ripped out once more. "Did I hear right, he couldn't have said...", I remember thinking as the judges words started to sink in. The judge spoke to him, that man who took away my every reason for being in a stern voice at the sentencing, telling him that for his crime he must be punished. Then the judge said the words that still echo in my head, "I do not believe that prison is the right place for you, because of your skills as a doctor you can be of great benefit to society." I tried to stand up and yell at the judge, but my legs just wouldn't lift me to my feet and I couldn't manage anything more that a whimper. Community service, how could that be. I wanted him to face justice for what he had done, but "because he a skill he got community service" I thought as I was overcome. Finally I screamed out "what ever happened to do no harm?", but by then I was the only one left in a dark and empty courtroom.  
  
As I now look back I realize that courtroom that night is much like my life without you is now, dark and empty. Then that feeling came back to me, the one which had haunted my dreams for the last three years. This was the dream where I look down on your broken body and you silently mouthed the words that tore me apart, the words, "how could you". Even though I new that it was not my fault that you were gone, I couldn't help but think that somehow it was. If we had just studied that night like we had planned to then we never would have been in that situation. It's amazing how even the littlest thing could make such a huge difference. If only I had held my arms around you for just a few more seconds we would have never have been separated. If only if I had given you one more kiss and crossed that street a few minutes later we would be together now.  
  
In these three years I have finally begun to accept that you were really gone, that I would never see you again. Some people would call this good, but accepting this just means that I have nothing left in my life to hope for. This is the feeling that I carry around with me now, the feeling that each day when I wake up there is no reason for me to get out of bed. If not for my attempts to show my family and the few friends I have left that I was all right, I most likely wouldn't get up at all. Right now that was something that I longed for, not waking up not having to fight anymore. I don't really want to die, it's just without you I am just finding it nearly impossible to live. I wished that there was someone that I could talk to, but I had cut myself off from everyone after you were gone that I couldn't go to them now. Everyone knew that we were close, but still they never really knew. I never told anyone exactly how close we had become that night, it just never seemed the right time and now how can I tell them what I've been hiding for so long. My brother is the closest thing to support that I've been able to find in the last three years without him to lean on I don't think that I would be writing this right now. Now that he has gone away to college I'm again alone with nothing but the quiet of my empty room and the thoughts of what could, or rather should have been.   
  
I now regret that we not had shared our feelings with each other sooner. After all I always saw it coming, our future that is. Even before that day I knew that we were destined to be together for the rest of our lives, I just never expected that to be so short a time. Some might wish that they didn't have the memory of those moments that we shared that day haunting them, but I don't. As much as it rips me apart to think about that day, I would never for get about the memories. I thought to myself that as long as I hold on to that day and the joy that I had felt you would remain alive forever. The three longest years of my life are behind me, but what lies ahead will be just as hard to face. Even though I know that you will never be able to read this letter it still helps that I write it, if even to throw it away when I'm done. You are my strength, and even after you're gone, your memory continues to give me the strength and hope that there will be a brighter day   
  
  
  
Love,   
  
Your Best Friend   
(And the One Who Loves You Too Much to Let Death Get in the Way.)  


**Melissa M. 03/09/79 – 02/05/98 11:56 PM. You are my strength, without you my life is dark and empty.**


End file.
